Snow  White was “the fairest of them all.” That was why the Queen tried to poison her. Not because Snow White had the cure for cancer or because she was extraordinarily kind; it was because she was pretty. This seems to follow a beauty standard that we uphold in the U.S.. No matter how beauty standards have changed over time, there is something that they all have in common: a standard. You either meet the criteria for being beautiful or you don’t. Perhaps you’re thinking, “Well that’s okay there’s other redeeming qualities to have besides physical attractiveness!” and you’re right! Except, society doesn’t seem to think so. According to the Social Issues Research Center, in a majority of situations, attractive people are coming out on top. Whether it be getting a better education, getting a job, or getting a shorter crime sentence, society attached prestige to pretty faces (www.sirc.org). We ultimately think that being good on the outside means you’re good on the inside.

In order to be “attractive” there is a certain i-deal we have here. Looking to the Kardashians is a prime example of the American beauty standard. Curvy bodies with a flat stomach and small waists. Yet even they struggle with attaining and upholding this standard, just last year Kylie Jenner admitted to using lip injections, coincidentally (or not) she seemed to be a lot more relevant in the media after she started plumping her lips. There’s a standard for men too; if you’re not buff and chiseled it’s time to lay off the doughnuts and hit the gym, my friend. Maybe grow a man bun while you’re at it. Oh wait, no are we over that? I can’t keep track.

A large portion of beauty for women is looking feminine. Large eyes and long eyelashes, complimented by big lips and long flowing hair. With that being said, I cut off my long hair into a short pixie only a few months ago. The first question I always seem to get is “why?” And my answer is usually something ridiculous like, “I needed to take my father’s place in the army and disguise myself as a man,” or, “I wanted more likes on my selfies.” But the real honest reason I cut my hair was because I wanted to. It’s simple and straightforward but people don’t seem to like that answer. A resounding “Oh,” was the response when I dared to be truthful.

That’s not to say that the overall response wasn’t positive. My family and friends have given me glowing compliments!  The only people who have felt entitled enough to respond negatively to my haircut, as a matter of fact, are middle aged male teachers. One such response to my hair was, “Oh I like her hair, it’s a little short though don’t you think?” to my friend standing nearby. More unwanted feedback included the exclamation of, “Wow! You’re very brave!” with the tone of someone who was eating a lemon, and the follow up of, “Don’t listen to me you look fine.” Unto which I told them that I did not, in fact, care what he, or anyone else, thought. Still, I’ve noticed strangers giving me double takes or staring a little longer than necessary. Sometimes it gives me pause. As talkative as a I can be, being in the spotlight can make me feel more self conscious now. Going against the standard is not easy, otherwise cutting my hair off would have been a nondescript experience. Still I recommend it, if only for the simple fact that I did get more likes on my selfies, and my neck doesn’t get sweaty anymore.

With all of the exclusion in society, it’s refreshing to have companies with body positive campaigns. #AerieReal which includes, “unretouched models of all sizes,” is meant to help young girls have realistic standards for their bodies. Even this has struggled though, in recent years Aerie has featured a lot of white, blonde women, a common standard of beauty in America. Another one is, Dove with their Real Beauty Campaign which includes having women of all shapes, sizes, and colors in their ads.

Celebrities are fighting back too, Adele, Demi Lovato, and Gabourey Sidibe are just a few of these body positive role models. For males, it’s a bit more complicated, but you still have James Corben baring his chest or donning a super-tight body suit for a sketch.  Yet, this is usually for a laugh and consequently may undercut the issue.

Whether you’re male or female, America has a lot of redefining to do in terms of what it means to be beautiful. Slowly but surely it seems the tides are changing and hopefully the beauty standard will be no standard. For now, don’t wear makeup, wear makeup no matter your gender, eat a cookie, work out at the gym; whatever it is that makes you happy. As for me, I need to go get my hair trimmed.