The Netflix comedy “You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah” is yet another misrepresentation of culture made by people who know almost nothing about what they are presenting. “You are so not invited to my bat-mitzvah” (YASNITMBM) is an unexceptional story filled with ridicule of the Jewish faith and borderline anti-semitism. The main plot of YASNITMBM is littered with mockery of Judaism and just plain childish writing that if they did any research at all or lived a real Jewish life they would be able to see how absolutely wrong they are.
In a nutshell, YASNITMBM follows a young 7th-grade girl named Stacy (played by Sunny Sandler) who is planning a bat mitzvah with her friend, Lydia. She ends up having a falling out with Lydia and doesn’t invite Lydia to Her Bat-Mitzvah. Over time and a breakup, they eventually become friends again but Stacy ruins it by destroying her whole Bat-Mitzvah with a video of the most embarrassing secrets and videos of Lydia’s life for all her friends and family to see. Heartbroken after just getting her friend back she decides to run her own Bat-Mitzvah by giving way her own Bat-Mitzvah to Lydia.
Although the plot of YASNITMBM may not be the worst ever made watching 2 dumb girls run around and be mad at each other with second-rate jokes and cringy lines isn’t always the most entertaining or interesting thing. Nor was the fact that the writing was just bad. I just didn’t enjoy many of the character’s lines or their development at all.
This is not the fault of the actors though. I didn’t find the acting a huge problem, nor the casting, in fact, I actually enjoyed that the Sandler family was in it. The part I was peeved by was the disrespect to Jewish people.
Sammi Cohen, the director, and Alison Peck, the writer, created something with little knowledge of the religion and really only information on the traditions of Judaism. With lines like “God is random” said by a rabbi makes me wonder if anyone in this movie’s production is really Jewish.
A recent quote from the director stated that they were a “queer, non-binary, very progressive jew” which makes me feel a little angry. They are making a film with Orthodox Jewish characters when they themselves are not. This wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for other topics but for this one, you should at least have someone who knows what they are talking about.
Alison Peck was foolish in her writing with characters like rabbi Rebecca just making me yell at my phone while watching it. Rebecca spent her time in the movie being a bad rabbi and singing and dancing about yeast infections. Going back to my point earlier about how she said that “God is random” to justify horrible things happening just really ticked me off because these kids have a real question about their lives and I bet people watching did too, and to see it just get stomped on with an answer like “God is random” is idiotic. It’s sad to see that such a good topic to talk about was ruined and probably made non-Jewish watchers feel like Judaism was a joke if it was just as simple as “God is random”.
Without the horrible representation of what a Jewish life looks like, I think that this might be an OK coming-of-age story. I come from a Christian household and I am a Christian myself but even I am not blind enough to see how ridiculously bad this film was at accomplishing its goal of making “Jewish people feel seen and celebrated.” It’s crazy to me that even a simple detail of getting the year that girls have their Bat-Mitzvahs goes right under their noses and they mess it up. I think if you’re Jewish this movie is not going to be the best thing to watch but if you are not just keep in mind that this is not an accurate representation at all.
Ms. Peirce • Feb 9, 2024 at 11:58 am
Enjoyed reading your article. Good work!